There’s some chatter going around right now that Kristol’s days may be numbered as a NYT columnist, which might help lead me back to being a regular reader. Just as impressive is Frank Rich’s G.O.P. post mortem, showing exactly how the Republicans have ruined themselves again and again, a select quote:

The 2004 Bush-Cheney campaign Web site even boasted a “Compassion” archive of photos of Bush with black folk, including Colin Powell. McCain used the same playbook this year, when he headed south to emote over Katrina victims and stock his own Web site with pictures depicting his adventures in black America. He had been a no-show in New Orleans during the six months after the hurricane hit, when his presence might have made a difference.

In other news, Joe The Backstabbing Sonuvabitch is getting off scot free for his behavior in the election. I’m half to three quarters considering registering as an Independent, not that it would help anything, as in NYC, I think Indies can’t vote in the primaries.

Hipster, and D-Bag

Click on the above image for a pretty funny video about hipsters.

Okay, I might just be a hipster. I listen to some hipster music, sometimes on big green awkward headphones that look like the things the guys on the ground at airports wear. I have some clothes from Uniqlo. I live adjacent to Williamsburg. And I found this video kinda funny and kind of worthwhile if only for the flappers comparison.

First of all, I’d like to float a Lieberman idea I’ve been passing around for a while out onto the net: I want Jon Stewart, this country’s most prominent and beloved Jewish person, to publicly boot Joe Lieberman from the Jewish Community. It would be much more symbolic than the vote that would happen tomorrow, but at least it would give me a good laugh.

Jesse spoke on the Lieberman topic today and I thought I wanted to throw my two cents into this take a penny leave a penny tray we call the internet before the secret ballot vote re: Lieberman tomorrow.

If you didn’t already know what’s going on here, let me set the story by bringing up the other person in the 2008 Presidential Campaign who went from Obama Friend to Obama Backstabber: the Rev. Jeremiah Wright. Obama was with him for years, trusted him, even defended him in the shitstorm of GodDamnAmericaGate, for a while, even said he wouldn’t throw the dude under the bus. Then, when Wright continued to be a thorn in Obama’s side, Obama said enough’s enough, Screw You Trinity United, I’ma Goin’ Home.

And to this point, I think a similar parallel can be made for Obama’s connection to a guy, who if he shut his mouth during the recount, and if FL was run right, would probably be ending his second term as Vice President right about now. He and Lieberman liked each other enough so that Obama went down to campaign on Joe’s behalf the CT race when Lierberman was being ousted from the Dems.

So how did Joey support Obama when Barack ran for Pres? Well, he went all Wright and damned Obama on the trail by not only speaking at the RNC, but going on stage and on trail with McCain and Sarah Palin, standing behind Palin during Palling Around With Terrorists Gate, and even saying he thought the “Is Barack a Marxist?” question was, well, a question one should ask out loud to others, rather than never be said because it’s just bullshit.

Yet, Barack still seems to support Joe. Why? When Bill Maher was on Huffington’s hosted version of Maddow, he said that Barack has been one step ahead of liberals who think that he’s about to make a mistake. Maybe he’s smarter than the average liberal right now, but to me, that’s only if he’s not really saying what he thinks to the public, but in fact saying what’s politically expedient.

If Obama is telling the truth about his feelings towards punishing Lieberman, then … I think Barack may have a terminal blindspot when it comes to those he thinks he knows and how his religion might teach him redemption, even when people don’t deserve it. I honestly don’t think it will matter much if Joe Lieberman puts an R next to that “-CT,” if Barack can beat the Clintons, than Joe can be overcome.

But then again, maybe he thinks he has to publicly support Lieberman, that if he doesn’t he’ll be written up as Politics as Usual. My inner conspiracy theorist, who wishes that Nick at Nite would pick up The X-Files, thinks that Barack may be actually sending a behind closed doors message to the dems to sink Lieberman. That the HRC as Secretary of State thing is political camo, to distract the media from what would be their big story if not for the chance to talk about Bill and Barack and their feelings towards each other. This is more far fetched than my Jon Stewart vs. Joe Lieberman bit, so I think we’ll all have to admit that Barack might not be right about Joe. The difference between Lieberman and Wright, is that maybe just maybe, Lieberman can be useful to someone. It’s doubtful, but nothing’s impossible, only improbable.

Dear Lorne Michaels, here is your new Obama impressionist. Let Armisen spend his SNL’s awkwardly making out with dudes like he did last Saturday.

But on a more real note, let me say that since Our Tanking Economy is all of our newest interest, I’ll try and do some coverage here. By some coverage, I mean I read Krugman’s blog and will try and share things if they warrant the space or more importantly, if I can understand said items. Today, Krugman goes all Nate Silver on the numbers and shows our economy is inextricably linked to the world economy.

Also in bailout news, here’s a shocker: Hank Paulson is starting to think that the bailout money, that $700 billion of ours, he may not want to spend it all right now. You know, be … smart about it?

Obama may have to put down the blackberry, but it’s kind of sad because that might have more to do with a fear of being on record saying something he wouldn’t want to associate himself with, rather than, you know, not being that dick in the movie theater with a glowing screen coming out of their pocket. Arianna brings up an interesting point tonight, we’ve got some smart bastards, why can’t they write a hack-proof program for Obama and only Obama?

Remember Rick Warren from the Saddleback Ranch Dialogue between Obama and McCain? Turns out he’s a much much bigger douchebag than anyone in the MSM was letting people know.

Either Prince is a homophobe or Perez Hilton has a better fact checking set up than The New Yorker. The end result is sure to boggle minds.

So I gave a little cred to Kutcher for his Big Oil should bail out Big Auto idea, but in the rarely mentioned (at least here at withapassion.com/, where this and the Prince blip are sole recent moments, to the best of my knowledge) topic of celeb gossip, I should point out a series of back and forths between Kutcher and Dan Savage that, if true, reveal Ashton Kutcher to be … well, either a homophobe or just plain uncomfortable with his name and homosexuality being bandied about together. Are those the same thing? Tell me loyal commenters.

Mark Cuban and Martha Stewart now have something else in common aside from being dicks, Insider Trading! Deadspin explains.

Finally, what the fuck Missouri, where are your fucking votes?

Lest anyone think McCain is the sole Capitol Hill humorist, check out this collection of jokes and Emanuel and Colbert let rip at a roast of Colbert this past Friday at a charity event for the Spina Bifida Association.

I’m not kidding. Check the link. If you didn’t know, Conan is taking Leno’s slot, and moving out to L.A. while Fallon takes Conan’s old slot. This idea alone was questioned.

So, my thoughts? I’ve had no faith in Fallon as a talent in years. There was the occasional spark of The Funny from him on SNL, but his laughing-through-his-lines to funny ratio was not going in the right direction. I’ve been sure for a while that the show is doomed to fail, and bringing in a name brand house band is not a good sign that Jimmy Fallon can keep the damn thing up on his own.

I’m praying this show dies as soon as America finally realizes the powerful flow that is The Roots, so that ?uest & Co. can get back to the road show. That is, if they want to. They’ve been touring for a shitlong now. Maybe they want to take some time and take a breath.

On the topic of young white preppy boys in the spotlight that say or do things that are decent? Ashton Kutcher on Bill Maher saying that Big Oil should be the ones bailing out Big Auto. I know it’s pie in the sky in terms of probablity, but how is KELSO the first one to say this?

How Could People So Cool Look So Toolish?

Thursday night, I got to see a preview screening of the new Bond flick, the inexplicably named and once vaguely referenced Quantum of Solace. Inexplicably, because, well, most Bond titles have a direct link to the plot, as in a villain or some such. The title’s obscurity was, in fact, the first sign that the Daniel Craig led Bond-verse is going to be a very good one. The OED in my computer claims that the Quantum’s second definition, which is by far the most easy to parse and relate to this film, is:

a required or allowed amount, esp. an amount of money legally payable in damages.

And there we find that a “Quantum of Solace” is comfort and peace found in revenge earned, which is the point of the film. Yes, the latest Bond movie is about revenge, and it can be about as much very well, because, it is a direct sequel to Casino Royale, the previous Bond movie, one of two actually fiscally and artistically successful franchise reboots of this decade (which places James Bond on a pedestal only Bruce Wayne is perched on at the moment). Will I go further into the plot? No. I’d rather not spoil anything here as I actually had some respect for the film.

The film is for the most part just as beautiful and balanced as Royale was, yet one scene is still annoying me in thoughts about the way it was shot. There’s a boat chase early on in the film that suffers from either piss poor coverage or lazy editing. The climax of the chase isn’t earned at all or well explained within the Bond Film laws of physics.

From the opening credits, you’d have thought the problems wouldn’t be confined to the editing of a single scene. The already publicly trashed Jack White & Alicia Keys opening number “Another Way To Die” is the precise nadir of the film, and it also helps me prove a point. Alicia Keys is god awful and has been such for a long long time now. Maybe her first single was good for the time, but that’s about it. Remember my post about coworkers with way too loud radios? Well, the other song I keep hearing coming out of that contiguous cubicle is the Alicia Keys track, “Everything’s Gonna Be Alright,” which I can summarize as best: It’s What Depressed Single Parents Break Down And Cry To When They’re Pushing Their Idiot Spawn Around In Target. Find the track and tell me it’s not that song. I’ve heard it enough to condense it down to that brief description.

The other red flag that comes up during the opening credits is one of the names in the writer credits: Paul Haggis. Paul “Crash” Haggis. Paul “I-Suck-&-Stole-The-Oscar-From-Brokeback” Haggis. But then I realized he had been on the writing staff for Casino Royale, so I sort of accepted it, as the movie had a lot of great dark comedic touches that I was kinda sure Haggis had his hands in.

Now, when it comes to the ladies, y’all were on point. Supposedly Olga Kurylenko, left in the top photo, has been doing this whole object of interest of the stoic pissed good guy for a while now. But seeing as I don’t go to see video game adaptations like Hitman and Max Payne, I wouldn’t have known. It turns out though, that whatever practice she’s had in this kind of role prepared her well. Hers and Bonds plots tie well together, as they’re both on a vengence beat. Judi Dench, you continue to rock M out with your metaphorical cock out. And Gemma Arterton, who played the wonderfully named Strawberry Fields, right in the top photo, your role in this movie was small, but you did manage to stay memorable in quite a long drawn out memorable Bond flick. Sure, Eva Green was amazing and we’d all love to see her again, but hey, her absence makes the revenge plot all the more strong.

But the real gem of the film is the performance from Mathieu Amalric, who I think I remembered from Munich, playing Dominic Greene, a fancy schmuck you want to see fail and fail hard. Le Chiffre (Mads Mikkelsen) from Royale wasn’t really the villain you thought Bond deserved, more gimmick than character, even though gimmick is seemingly always a part of the Bond villain mold. But with regards to Dominic Greene, this slimy shite, the audience delights in his fall, and he’s also particularly handy with melee weapons, which makes things fun.

All the other tropes of the film are finely handled, with the film being a tad light on gadgets, though. Cleese wasn’t in Royale either, though, so maybe in our ultra modern times, the franchise is going to try and limit 007 to more conventional weaponry and leave the gadgets to the functionality of plot devices. The film is beautiful and well rounded in terms of epic locales, along with a great taste in typography to further announce each new city Bond hops to.

On the last note, I’d have to say that the Felix Leiter character continues to be perfected by Jeffrey Wright, who I hope to see continue to survive the series for as long as the actor so wants. The disgruntled American, angry with his toolish government fucking everything up, is expertly handed by Wright, and really helps the film fit this time period it’s being released in, even better than the evils behind Going Green plot that is almost lost in the horrible Greene pun of the Amalric character.

All in all, Quantum of Solace is more than worth the now exorbitant price of admission.

That’s from Jay Smooth over at Ill Doctrine.

On November 5th, at around 1 in the morning, hours after it was announced that Barack Obama will be the 44th President of these United States of America, I did something I didn’t think I’d have the want to do again in my lifetime: I waved a flag, and I liked it.

In the southern side of Union Square last night, at around one in the morning, and probably well before then as well as well after then, things were, to use a parlance of the time, going down. I bumped into fellow Bard alumni who were reveling in President-Elect Obama’s victory, I waited on like outside of Artichoke hours later and the mood was as lively there as it has ever been. 14th Street was running deep in high fives.

For the rest of the post, click through the jump, I think all that video is a bit cloggy.

But let’s rewind. Let’s rewind back to 2004, actually. Yes, the speech is where I think the story starts, if we can momentarily forget that starting in 2001, George W. Bush began 8 years of shitting on the country that are finally about to be over.

In 2004, the Democratic Party should have picked Howard Dean. The Media and it’s choice to flick the Repeat-One switch on with regards to Dean’s scream. After that, It seemed as if half-man, half-Easter Island statue John Kerry was the pick. Except this was a shitty pick. Rhetorically, he was poorer than Al Gore at his lockbox-iest in 2000. Personally, the guy couldn’t inspire the party as he went water skiing, which was seen as douchey, which it very well may be when you’re supposed to be running an election.

But then, there was the keynote speech at the 2004 Democratic National Convention, and I don’t remember much about where I was when I saw it, or even if I saw it live. I probably didn’t. I probably caught it online the next day. Here it is:

I loved that speech. You’d have to be the Grinch himself to scoff at that one. But Kerry was the nominee, so I couldn’t very well write Obama’s name in. I voted for Kerry, who then lost. On my way to the polling station in 2004, though, as I walked a mile in upstate New York, I listened to Jadakiss’ “Why?” remix featuring Styles P, Common, and Nas, and notably Common’s line, “Why’s Bush actin‘ like he tryin’ to get Osama, why don’t we impeach him, and elect Obama?” I made a screen name on AOL that revolved around the words Elect Obama.

So Kerry lost. Dean got the DNC leadership position. Nobody knew who would get the top spot in 2008. I remember someone tossed Russ Feingold’s name up.

Then the field was unveiled. I thought Edwards, Richardson, or Obama would be decent picks. I never really got the whole Hillary thing, as I thought she’d be unelectable, what with the hatred there is for the Clinton Brand. Joe Biden, I think, impressed everyone with the Ridy Noun Verb 9/11 joke, which sort of was his plea to the leading candidates to consider him a decent and witty attack dog VP.

Soon, though, it was whittled down to Barack Obama vs. Hillary Clinton. Hillary’s campaign was shit, not at the level McCain’s was, but it was shit. I thought Obama could appeal to more people because he wasn’t basing his run around negativity and how much whitey loves him the way Hillary did. Oh, and by the way, WHITEY LOVES THEM SOME BARACK OBAMA. Obama did 7pts better with White people than Kerry did. Hillary was making shit up left and right about being shot at in Kosovo and being Little Hillary Oakley growing up. Part of me wondered if enough of America was over race enough for Obama to win, and people like this crazy old bitch, who does not deserve to be named, was definitely the reason why I wondered about America being ready enough to elect then Sen. Obama:

These are the PUMA’s. Not much was left to be said about them after the point in time when I’d written this piece on them. I was wrong that they’d be a lasting waste of time, Sarah the Lipsticked-Pitbull and Faux the Plumber, both of whom I’ll get to later, filled the mindless gap left behind by operation repulsive idiotic white people angry that the public might believe a black man is better than they are.

During the thick of the Barack VS Hillary campaign it was obvious Keith Olbermann was on Obama’s side, and the backlash to the Olbermania happened with a New Yorker piece and after Keith set his Special Comment sights on Hillary after her reference to a possible attempt on then-Senator Obama’s life. It was the apex of Olbermann’s cringe-inducing ability. Since then, I’m happy to report he’s used his powers for good and not evil.

Speaking of Keith, he, and newly minted MSNBC host Rachel Maddow, became required viewing in my apartment. In an apartment where I had no physical roommates, I’d reached a point of watching the MSNBC 2-hours-of-power duo so much they were as frequently present as the Stewart/Colbert powerhouse. Someone had joked to me on Twitter that Keith and Rachel would spontaneously make out on TV if Obama won. This is funny cause you know: Rachel loves the ladies, and Keith loves, well, the ladies.

As things got more and more heated between Hillary and Barack, I got more and more amped up in my damnation of Sen. Clinton. What I took as undermining Barack as a candidate, I now can understand to be a fleshing out and testing out of his will as a candidate. The elongated primary made Obama 08 go to every single god damn nook and cranny of this craggy country a candidate for a major party nominee could go to. Bringing the Wright story to the forefront of the table then, as opposed to in the general election, is seen in hindsight as a preferable option. This all being said, fuck you very much Geraldine Ferraro. Whomever leaked the Obama in garb photo to Drudge thereby putting lighter fluid on the Secret Muslim meme, fuck you upside the face with a plunger. Bill, you just don’t get it anymore. You still don’t like Obama. We could all tell at that final rally. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I kind of dig Hillary more than I dig you now. Bill, do something to prove me wrong.

Then, once Obama finally made it an undeniable mathematical impossibility for Hillary to get back in it, and by the way, NO MORE SUPER DELEGATES YOU STUPID FUCKING DEMS, which was hard to do, as Hillary and her people were living in what Rachel Maddow called “The Post-Rational Universe,” it became obvious it was Obama VS McCain, and it seemed like … well, some “Serious Journalists” had yet to realize John McCain wasn’t going to be running a “Serious Campaign,” even after the “Celebrity” ad. I remember talking about that ad to a centrist friend, a recovering Republican, who was happy for the commercial because it was actually working to help McCain in the polls, which I had a hard time denying.

Which brings me to a side note: part of my internet detox happening relates to how OCD I got over the polling stats. 1pm is a time with little significance to most other than it’s near or around lunch time. For me, it was a time to head to gallup.com to check their daily tracking poll for the election. Real Clear Politics and FiveThirtyEight.com both were household names in my one man household, and I was especially interested when slaps flew between the two sites, regarding openness of methodology. Nate Silver, founder of FiveThirtyEight had his own method and practices, based around feeding stacks and stacks of polls into an algoithm to test out every single possibility for the election, questioned and mocked, especially by Dick Bennett of polling firm ARG who likened what Nate Silver did to palm-reading. Well Dick, Nate got the %age numbers for the candidates closer than anyone else did, within .1 for each of them. Who’s the gypsy bitch now, ya dick?

And there you see how silly my obsession became. I knew about infighting between pollsters. I praised Nate Silver’s site, which featured documentary photography work that would reveal how barely staffed McCain campaign offices are.

This was during the weekend before the election!

One of the photo documentaries also featured Sonja Sohn (Kima Greggs), Seth Gilliam (Ellis Carver), and Gbenga Akinnagbe (Chris Partlow) of The Wire at an Obama rally. That site was so in-my-wheelhouse you’d have think I dreamt it.

We continued down the rickety path toward the election, with the big smack upside the head not being Obama’s pick of Biden, which could have really set the PUMA base up in smoke, but “McCain’s” pick of Sarah Palin, the Governor of Alaska; former Mayor of Wasilla, AK; one time beauty queen runner up and Ms. Congeniality winner (note, why did McCain keep saying he never won a congeniality award?). Ms. Palin who continues to run her mouth off at the media for their elitist sexist bull. Ms. Palin who I will now refer to, in my best elitist voice as a primo example of the SCUM OF THE EARTH. Ms. Palin hit the scene running around like a hateful alpha bee with an ember in her beehive.

My favorite moment of her being an evil evil bitch was the whole “I guess being a community organizer is kinda like being a small town mayor, except I actually had responsibility.” nonsense. My reply to this comment, is sort of a spoiler, but since we all know how this ends, let me say this loud and clear:

I guess being a small town mayor is kinda like being a community organizer except Barack Obama organized a country to elect him President, and kick you, Caribou Barbie, and your Sad Grandpa running mate, back to the shitholes from whence you came.

At this point, we turn to the renewed relevance of Saturday Night Live, which made the no duh decision to bring former cast member and head writer Tina Fey back to savage Sarah Palin. At one point, the joke on the table from Ms. Fey was exactly what Gov. Palin had said. When you’ve gone so far down the shitter that you’re unintentionally giving the comedians fodder, you’re gone off the rails.

It turned out that Palin wasn’t vetted by Team McCain 08 in the slightest. The campaign had gone further down that rabbit hole of empty politiking that we saw it start off on with the “Celebrity” ad.

Then … there were the debates. But before we could have the debates, McCain tried to put his campaign on hold because TEH ECONAMEE IS KRATERIN! and postpone the first debate. He cancelled on Letterman in what some, those being Letterman and Keith Olbermann, would jokingly refer to as a moment where the public saw behind the campaign curtain of lies from McCain Palin 08, as Letterman cut to the raw feed of McCain doing a Couric interview. Letterman yells into the monitor, “Mr. Senator, I have a question! Would you like a ride to the airport?”

Many, mostly conservative squawk-boxes like Pat Buchanan, blame McCain’s loss on the cratered economy. Well, maybe if McCain had picked Mitt “Nobody Likes Me” Romney, the economy wouldn’t have murked his chances. Sure, it wouldn’t have mobilized and reach-arounded his base, but that’s what your candidate is supposed to do BEFORE the VP pick.

Obama played it safe, to make Americans think he was safe; McCain played it like a blind man at a urinal, which made America think twice about which candidate they actually knew. Who the fuck is this senior citizen talking about nailing jello to the wall, they wondered in America. Palin tried to wink and change the subject through the sole VP debate, and America kinda bought it, thanks to the bar being set for her at a subterranean level.

Then there was the Palling Around With Terrorists & Real/Fake America cycle. Palin, doing something the McCain team claims she did on her own without authorization, led a cheer of Obama <3 Terrorists Long Time. The term terrorist by itself is questionable, as we all know by the time Obama met Bill Ayers, Ayers was as reformed as G. Gordon Liddy was the last time he and McCain jerked each other off. The pluralization of the word is where things get juicy and not to subtle in the implication: Obama and Osama roll together.

This led to a late in the game moment of the McCain Palin supporters are racist assholes meme, started by, well, said supporters, who, when presented with a camera in their faces, let loose with their crazy cannons:

So it was late in the game, and at the same time, Drudge linked to a story about Obama using the phrase “Spread the Wealth” when talking to a guy, Joe Wurzelbacher, who approached Obama while the Senator was campaigning door-to-door on his own behalf. Of course, McCain picked the meme of Joe, who called himself a plumber, which we now know to be a lie, during the final debate, which then started the hopefully now over 15 minutes of Faux The Plumber’s fame. McCain would blame Obama and the media for ruining Joe’s privacy.

Above, Joe would say Obama’s election would be the death of Israel, which Fox News anchor Shep Smith had to correct him on, more on Shep pwning self righteous idiots later when a certain old fool hits the nadir of his own career. Fox News’ program “Fox & Friends,” even had FtP on as a guest to chat. And there was even the rumor that Joe had done some strange with SNL’s Kristen Wiig, thankfully for my appetite, that has been debunked by Defamer.

A couple weeks before the election went down, I and my friend Eric went to PA to volunteer for the Obama campaign, as it was becoming increasingly public knowledge that McCain believed the primary season Hillary vote was the key to PA’s 21 electoral votes. The episode of the This American Life podcast, “Ground Game,” is a great documentation of both sides fighting for Pennsylvanians, more specifically, that thing called “Pennsyltucky” in between the Blue parts of PA. My experience in PA was far shorter, just an afternoon, and far worse. We were fired up and ready to … drive to an incorrectly typed in location thanks to an Obama PA intern who mistyped a word, causing me to waste three hours lost in PA with a 55 year old Nigerian man who lives in Brooklyn runs a limo company that calls him every five fucking minutes on the dot, had me read his credit card number over the phone to buy those tiny car calendars, and who had an accent thick enough to scare away some particularly unreachable whiteys in PA. There, I’ve said it. I wanted to not say any of that until Barack won. And he did.

But before he did, it was fun to watch the time run out. Drudge tried to claim Obama was going to ruin the coal industry. That didn’t work. McCain, Sarah Barracuda, and Faux all but called Obama a dirty stinking commie for the spread the wealth comment. That did nothing. The numbers tightened a little, but I think that’s more because McCain finally took the reins and told his batshit racist fan base to wise up and that Obama wasn’t an Arab. He didn’t say there wasn’t anything wrong with being an Arab though.

Election day happened. I was with my parents when I voted, waiting an hour and half in SoHo. Drudge and FOX tried to make the MSM flinch over OMG BLACK PANTHERS! And nobody cared. McCain had run such a shitty campaign, that even hardcore racists were voting Obama. Then the moment I knew it was probably over happened with MSNBC before it happened with any other network. They called PA for Obama. Nobody else would. I was worried they would have to un-call it. Then the rest followed suit. When FOX called PA for Obama, then it was his. The best moment of the night was when Turd Blossom himself was talking about how important Ohio was for McCain, and then Brit Hume had to break it to Rove that, well, Obama won Ohio.

Chuck Todd Misses The Fairer Sex & Knows Why McCain Lost

From then on out it was over. Obama hit 200 without California, so Keith Olbermann made it clear that well, with CA, Obama’s home state of Hawaii, and Oregon, it would essentially be OVER, which, by an uncharacteristically early, in this decade, 11pm EST, it was. McCain’s speech was good, his audience was made up of the only support he had left at this point, the angry racist douchebag demo. Did anyone see the weeping skinhead with the kid over his shoulder? Hi-larious.

So, then before I knew it, I was on 14th Street, or as I liked to call it: HIGH FIVE CITY. Bumped into some friends from Bard, one of whom kept demanding that the populous go streaking. And I waved a flag, a big flag on a big wooden stick. I think I might get me a flag now. Or maybe I’ll wait until Guantanamo is closed down. And now, for the pure funny section of the post, which is the ending:

A message from myself and the country, to Bible Spice.

Also, here are some words that Tracy Morgan spoke on TV before anyone in The Lower 48 knew what a Palin was:

And here’s a funny video from the series “Get Your War On” (LINK IF VIDEO ISN’T WORKING):

But to end on a brilliant note, here are photos acquired from AprilWinchell.com:

THAT IS ALL.

Internet, goodbye for a while. For a condensed version of this story head to http://thisfuckingelection.com

UPDATE: I know I didn’t talk Prop 8, but that’s still being fought, right? Fucking Mormon church assholes. Expect some thoughts on Prop 8 when I come back.

UPDATE THE 2nd: I wanted to get this out there, I HATE CANDY CROWLEY, WHAT A FUCKING ASSHAT.

Update the third: Remember, Blame Bill Kristol for Sarah Palin.

Gracious... NOT.

Somehow, more respectable.

You’ve been deleted from the Bias folder in my bookmarks.

DISAPPEAR LIKE POOF, BITCH-B-GONE!